Unsweetened by Lois Greiman

Author:Lois Greiman [Greiman, Lois]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-1-64197-037-2
Publisher: NYLA

Seventeen

If evolution is real and shit changes according to need, how come we don’t have more middle fingers?

—James McMullen, who actually had the requisite number

* * *

I sank slowly back into my chair.

The senator stared at me, expression curious, tone cordial. “Congratulations?”

Shirley appeared in the doorway behind Hiro, eyes wide, fingers twitchy, as though she’d heard a missile rushing toward me but couldn’t determine the direction of the strike.

“At times, I think I can almost predict your next move,” Hiro said, “but you’ve managed to surprise me yet again.”

“Forgive me,” the senator said, handsome brow furrowing. “But who are you?”

Hiro didn’t even bother turning toward him. “Had I known you were considering a union, perhaps I would have offered my own neck for the yoke.”

Shirley gasped softly, expression horrified.

The senator only managed a baffled “Christina?”

“I but wonder,” Hiro continued, “is it strictly a love match or should we be expecting a—”

“Puppy!” Shirley rasped and pushed into the room like a bulldog on a mission.

The three of us stared at her. I with gratitude. The senator with surprise. Hiro’s expression might have actually shown some amusement.

The senator spoke first. “What did you say, Ms. Templeton?”

“Ms. McMullen!” Her tone had the bite of disapproval. “She’s getting herself a new dog.”

I was trying to keep up. Honest to God, I was, but my mind, impeded by a hundred thousand fat grams and marriage to a man-child with really great hand-kissing technique, wasn’t ticking along quite as fast as it could have been.

“Isn’t that right, Ms. McMullen?”

Silence pulsed in the room.

“Ms. McMullen?” Shirley urged.

I nodded shallowly, as if my chin were too tired to bob.

“A puppy?” the senator asked.

“I told her,” Shirley said and clucked her tongue. “Them puppies is more work than twin babies, but you know our girl here.” Squeezing past Hiro, she curled a beefy arm around my shoulders. “She’s just so big hearted. Saw that little mastiff at the pound and couldn’t say no.”

Hiro grinned, just the curl of a lip. The senator scowled. “You’re getting another dog, Christina?”

“Well . . . ” There was a lump in my throat. It wasn’t easy pushing out a lie as big as my ever-growing derriere. “You know how it is. We all do what we can.”

“Of course,” the senator said.

But Hiro shook his head. “I do not believe I know how it is.”

We looked at him as if he’d sprouted a tail.

“Please explain, Ms. O’Tara.” Scarlet O’Tara was the alias I’d adopted months ago. The idiot name I’d taken to protect my true identity had come back to bite me in the ass on a fairly regular basis.

“Ms. . . . ” The senator shook his head. “What is this about? Is this man bothering you, Christina?”

Hiro glanced at him for the first time, face so serene, so absolutely confident, it seemed to shake the core of the universe.

I failed to answer, may have failed to breathe.

“I’m going to have to insist that you leave, young man,” the senator said.

Danshov raised a brow and turned to face him.

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